The excessive, yet irritatingly banal few minutes of exposition before the game begins fails to setup the forthcoming action through its stilted attempt at drama, leaving players a little confused as to what’s actually going on when the game really does begin. Before the game even begins, players are brutally neutered with a blunt sword when they’re subjected to the impassive, turgid voice acting and embarrassing accents and pronunciations (the Persian who explains how his “bow serves all of Persia” – pronouncing “bow” in accordance with the term “curtsy” – has already raised a chorus of titters from across the internet).
Not that I would expect World Forge or the publisher, Playlogic, to generate interest by saying “Ancient Wars: Sparta – mediocre RTS at its most ordinary! Casually pick up your copy next time you’re passing the games shop, if you can be bothered!”, but building expectations in a totally unrealistic fashion with claims of “graphics at the same quality level as shooters” is only going to lead to disappointment.Īnd it doesn’t take long before those excessive claims are put to pasture. Perhaps Ancient Wars: Sparta wouldn’t be quite so underwhelming if it weren’t for the bold promises made during the game’s two year build up. Regrettably, World Forge apparently forgot to bring in any adolescent consultants during the development of the first in its Ancient Wars series, and Sparta has been disappointingly portrayed as a state of bureaucratic, posturing, slightly feeble men in short skirts. Fair enough, these might not be completely true to fact, but as any school kid will tell you, real history is boring. Total and utter blood-lustin’, ass-kickin’, block-rockin’, hard-fightin’, ball-crunchin’, over-hyphenated war bastards!Īt least, that’s what I’ve come to learn from the most recent retellings of historical events in the form of 300 and God of War. I mean like, a total cross breed of football hooligans, American wrestlers, Cyberdyne T800 Model 101 Terminators and anomalies from deep within the Matrix. Four against two – exciting stuff (*yaaaawn*)Īlthough it’s possible to zoom into the action without really affecting system performance, it’s just not a practical way to keep the chaotic controls in hand
It might seem like the perfect time to feed the voracious appetites of a war hungry, Spartan obsessed public, but unfortunately for World Forge, this Jackanory version of history is a wet rag next to our current, wonderfully unrealistic, expectations of ancient Greece.Ī good example of one of the many early battles players must endure to get to the good stuff.